In April 2024, when I turned 40, I made a decision.
I hit the reset button on my life.
Not because I suddenly had everything figured out. Not because I knew exactly what the next two and a half years would hold. And certainly not because changing my life would be easy.
I simply knew I wanted to become the best version of myself that I could be.
And along the way, God began showing me that becoming my best self isn't just about what happens on the outside. It's about what happens within me.
It is about my heart.
My thoughts.
My priorities.
My focus.
My relationship with Him.
I've learned that sometimes God doesn't ask us to become someone completely different. Sometimes He asks us to surrender the things that have been keeping us from becoming who He created us to be.
And that process takes work.
Over these past two and a half years, I've worked on myself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. I've made changes. I've had victories. I've had setbacks. I've had days when I felt strong and days when I wondered if I was making any progress at all.
But I kept going.
And today, I'm 150 pounds down. 🩷🙌
That number represents more than weight.
It represents thousands of decisions.
It represents choosing again.
It represents getting back up.
It represents saying, “I'm going to keep going,” even when the journey wasn't easy.
My health is improving, and I'm incredibly thankful for that.
But God has also been teaching me something even more important:
I have to keep working on my soul.
Because we can work on our bodies and neglect our spirits.
We can change our habits but neglect our hearts.
We can become disciplined in one area while allowing distraction to take over another.
And I've learned that my focus matters.
We live in a world that can feel completely upside down. There is plenty around us that can steal our peace, consume our thoughts, and make us forget how good God really is.
But when I deliberately focus on the goodness of God in the middle of a world turned upside down, something changes.
I begin to see His goodness.
I begin to feel His presence.
I begin to remember that He is still God.
He hasn't changed.
His promises haven't changed.
And I am not alone.
Jesus said He would not leave us comfortless. He promised us the Holy Spirit—the One who walks beside us, comforts us, teaches us, guides us, and helps us.
And I have needed Him.
There are moments when I recognize the enemy's game.
I recognize the distraction.
I recognize when my focus has shifted from God to everything happening around me.
And when I realize it, I have a choice.
I can continue staring at the distraction...
or I can turn my eyes back toward Jesus.
And when I do, the peace comes back.
The calm returns.
My perspective changes.
The situation may not have changed—but my focus has.
That is something the Holy Spirit has been reminding me lately:
He's still here.
He's still comforting.
He's still guiding.
He's still helping.
He's still speaking peace in the middle of the storm.
And maybe that's the reminder someone else needs today, too.
Maybe you're working on yourself right now.
Maybe you're trying to break old habits.
Maybe you're rebuilding your health.
Maybe you're learning to set boundaries.
Maybe you're trying to become more disciplined.
Maybe you're starting over.
Maybe you're looking at your life and thinking, I have so much work left to do.
Don't despise the process.
Keep going.
Give God your best—not because you have to earn His love, but because He is worthy of your best.
Take care of the body He gave you.
Guard the mind He gave you.
Protect the peace He gives you.
Spend time in His Word.
Listen when the Holy Spirit corrects you.
And when the enemy distracts you, recognize the game and get your focus back.
You don't have to have everything perfect.
You just have to keep moving toward Jesus.
Two and a half years ago, I hit the reset button.
I'm still becoming.
I'm still growing.
I'm still learning.
I'm still working on me.
And I'm realizing that the goal was never simply to become a better version of myself.
The goal is to become more of the woman God created me to be.
And as long as He gives me breath, I'm going to keep pressing forward.
One decision.
One day.
One prayer.
One step.
One surrender at a time.
Because the same God who helped me start this journey is the God who will help me finish it.
And through every change, every challenge, every distraction, and every victory — He's still here.
And somewhere along the way, you learn to truly enjoy life again and experience fun things like parsaling, zip lining and riding every roller coaster at Six Flags because you can safely fit in the restraints or your under the weight limit for certain activities; and facing my fear to do it. I've been in maintenance mode with my weight loss the past six months. If I don't lose anymore I am okay with that, because I think I am at a healthy place for me for my body frame and height, but if I do push through a lose the last 40 pounds I am hoping to lose I am okay with that; but I feel like some of that would need to be skin removal surgery and I am just not open to going down that round..I am okay with.me. God helped me to truly get my life back when I turned 40; He divinely connected me to a doctor who helped me and not just tell me what I needed to do. Not just physically, but spiritually, God helped me, because He also finally got me to wake up and realize I was in a church where I could walk with Him in "spiritual stability". Keep becoming. Keep growing. Keep your focus on Jesus. He's still here. It's all about for me, still becoming a better woman (of God). 🩷🙌
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Suggested Prayer:
"Dear Lord, thank You for never leaving me comfortless. Thank You for Your Holy Spirit, who comforts me, guides me, corrects me, and reminds me of who You are. Help me continue becoming the woman You created me to be. Give me discipline when I need it, grace when I stumble, wisdom when I am distracted, and strength to keep going. Help me focus on Your goodness even when the world around me feels upside down. When the enemy tries to steal my peace, remind me to turn my eyes back to You. Thank You for every victory, every lesson, every reset, and every new beginning. I give You my best because You gave me everything. In Jesus' name, Amen."
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